Sweeping

You've swept me off my feet, now it's time for me to sweep you off yours (:

Wangsta

happy bday john wang (: i get so tired. i'm slowly declining. coffee cant even keep me up anymore. i'm like an old engine that has 100,00 miles + on it. i'll still run but not at its fullest potential. slowly going awayyy. i dont know how much longer i can last. people dont even know who i am and they can just judge me. they dont think highly of me. they think they're better than me. i thought all men were created equal. social status is superfluous now. its who you are, not what you are. i dont need to flaunt to be who i am. i keep it on the down lowww. sometimes i feel like i'm so restricted, but my parents now what they're doing. its all for the better. i know it. i can tell. for a scholarship app, i was asked for family income. i dont even know how much my parents make. it doesn't matter to me though that my mom has become so high in position. she deserves it because she worked her way up. she doesnt want me to know our income because she thinks once i know, i'll be flamboyant. she just said, i can retire right now and go take a vacation for the rest of my life. geez whats that supposed to mean? i dislike people being materialistic. it gets the best of us. nice cars. nice clothes. nice shoes. newest technology. newest releases. newest everything. i admit i'm a bit materialistic sometimes. i try to keep it at a minimum though. sometimes i say 'oh, he has a nice car. or nice shoes' but thats because its probably a passion. you wouldn't know how hard it is to make money until you actually worked yourself. it really isn't that easy. mortgage, utilities, bills, gas. your whole salary's gone!
on another note,
everyday, i go to sleep feeling that i've tried my best. i really do. i never give up. its just fuel to my fire. you piss me off. i'm even more driven. you dont think i can. i will prove to you i can. you look down on me. you just threw a huge log into my fire. and boy is it burninggg. i just want to be appreciated for the things i do. maybe a thank you once in a while. gracias if two words is too much for you. everything i do, its just to please other people. i jsut think: if they're happy, i'm happy. i dont mind pleasing others, its just that i dont even deal with myself first. i feel like shit. i dont even take care of myself. i'm an engine whose been slacking on oil changes. why cant people see the good in me? people always start with the negatives. i can never please anyone. there's always something i do wrong. okay. i'm done rantingg

wadif i did this for all my posts?! no pics. no songs. no vids. can i say b-o-r-i-n-g? oh yeah you guys dont care.

One Love

"BABY HERE I AM,
i'm your man, i came with everything you needed
you and me are undefeated, until the end of time
ONE MIND, ONE HEART, ONE LOVE
all you gotta do is take
my hand, we will stand,
this was made to last forever
so let's say it together
for the rest of time
ONE MIND, ONE HEART, ONE LOVE"



One Love - Trey Songz




boy i haven't blogged in a while :/ well school finally started! i love 0-4 (: my teacher's are all cool. have hewit twiceee. here's a wrapuppp

0 hewit stats - she's strict. but she writes the ap test so yayy
1 gwilliam econ - my lazy class -.- watched ugly betty and devil wears prada already
2 alcosser math hl - energetic teacher, good review of math. friday's test was hard ):
3 hewit psych - fun class, i'll learn lotsa interesting stuff heree! 'motion in the ocean'! hewits so much more nicer in this class
4 moran rhet - heard he's chill, but he seems sorta strict LOLL. hes funny though especially when he cusses :P
then LUNCH TIMEEE! i usually just go home or village or something -.- i needa chill with jkoe one of htese dayss. and i also needa visit wells or else hes gonna forgot i'm on the team -.-

btw if you guys didnt' know, college apps are so stressful. i can't wait till there done. 2nd semester please come. then time just freeezeeee. my dad send me a businessweeklink of the top colleges and all the privates i'm applying to are in the top 20 with less than 20% acceptance rates. there goes my chances -.-

superduper random pics!

thanks mark (: nike says: listenup! everybody knows we wreak havoc. The swoosh is a force to be recognized on the court. This is a just do it generation. Lace up!

blue tie. went with this one (:

yellow tie.

superannuated man -.-

lolrandom

birdie when i'm bored picking up my brother -.-

red needles love.

tint&no tint difference?

hate lines ):

i want one that says grade 8 instead!

yes middle names kendrick -.-

prince of wales approved me (: HAHA

desk from my lamp's point of view

need to practice. i got one shot to pass!

bombbbb

awesome quote. i need to follow this (:

give me STRENGTH

rofl bed sheets yellow -.-

messy room

alex. still playing as if he was in the olympicss

sin LOL and STAT (hewit's fav button)

thank you comp for lasting me 4 years of high school. cant wait to upgrade to laptop! yayy

decal.

it's so fucking hard dealing with this. if you didn't know, i had five fucking minutes to say all that i had to say when she took her last breaths in the intensive care unit back in december. you know how hard that was? i didnt' even know if she could hear me. i needed days, weeks, months, years, to say all i needed to say. it wasn't even a private moment. even after so many months later, i went to the waiter and said 'party of five', when there's only four of us. how come i always cry when i think about all the times we had together? its because you were so special to me. no one can ever replace you. something's always missing at home now. i haven't been happy even once since you left. i'm not sure if i will ever be happy again. you guys must be saying, "why doesn't he just get over it?" its because i can't. if you had a grandma like this, then you would know how i feel. the instant i wasn't feeling well, she would book the next flight just to come over here from hong kong. well at least now i can sit on teh green grass by your side and look at the view and talk about anything while your resting in peace. i've driven her only once in my life. from the hospital after a transfusion to home. thats it. i had dreams when i was young that i would buy her a house that she deserved when i grew up. passing by her house is never easy. i always tear up going around that corner. thinking about all the little things she did for me just hurts me ): i even knew she loved me more than my brother and i took that for granted. who else would make sure that my sideburns were even? my collar was down? my back was straight? my bed was neat? my clothes ironed? my eggs scrambled? who made sure i ate first before she had her meal? only my grandma.

brother getting water for flowers at rose hills LOL

first time grandma saw car (:

nice viewwww.

hate looking at this ):

whenever i was with you, time was wasted. i should've spent time with her instead. why did you hurt me? you didn't even care. not one bit. i thought you did, but apparently not. it pisses me off everytime i have to think about this. i thought you were a good person, but you didnt' even give a shit. you reeled me in and then broke the chain. why did i try so hard when you didn't even give any effort? what a waste of time. now i regret everythingg.